


Save It For Your Deathbed

by Bawgdan



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Drabble, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-17
Updated: 2019-04-17
Packaged: 2020-01-15 09:33:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18496216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bawgdan/pseuds/Bawgdan
Summary: Illumi hasn't spent enough time enjoying the world. 'An idle mind is the devil's playground' is his mother's favorite saying. She might actually be right.





	Save It For Your Deathbed

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The Zoldyck's have a strange way of showing love. Kikyo's love language is suffocation while Silva's ways are practical to the point of vacancy, who Illumi has mostly taken after.

Hisoka had teased him— _How is it that someone as boring as Illumi is brought up in such a chaotic household without a personality?_

Illumi doesn't know what he means. He thinks he has a very big personality. His presence isn't commanding is all...and it has to be this way forever in order to be an assassin. Hisoka makes messes wherever he goes. Always leaving behind a trail of red fingerprints

"I have a funny question." Illumi sits beside Hisoka on an airship. They just so happened to be at the same place at the same time, which happens a lot. Hisoka is quite the busybody.

Illumi waits for him to make a sound, because while he might've been raised by a pack of wolves, Kikyo did teach him a thing or two about manners. Not a lot, but enough to navigate the world outside of their house.

Hisoka folds his arms on the windowsill, his eyes darting back and forth as he watches the changing scenery beneath them—an ocean to mountains. Illumi stops waiting. Hisoka doesn't have manners and that's what he likes the most about him.

"Have you ever been in love?" He asks Hisoka as if he is asking for the time.

The topography of his face changes. His soft features became sharp angles. Whenever Hisoka frowns, the tip of his nose looks pointy.

But Hisoka thinks about it because his silence is unnaturally long. Illumi has studied him for long periods of time to know when Hisoka is being sincere. Hisoka laughs a lot when he isn't being sincere.

"Maybe," Hisoka says cryptically. Illumi knows this means 'No'. Hisoka can't answer questions directly.

"I figured as much." Illumi sits his hands on his knees, tilting his head to the side.

"Then why did you ask?" Hisoka presses a finger against the glass like he's poking the setting sun.

"Because I read about it a lot but I don't know what it looks like. I can surmise what it might feel like but you can feel a thing and never show it." Illumi nods his head because he has had a lot of time to think about it. The thought didn't just happen overnight. It took hours, months, and years of soul searching, which is something his mother speaks against passionately. _If you spend too much time rummaging through your heart, you will end up making a doorway for unnecessary 'things' to step inside._ This could hinder his work.

"Do you think you're in love with me?" Hisoka might be serious. It's hard to tell, even for Illumi's good intuition.

"We have had this conversation before. I think you're ugly." Illumi shakes his head robotically. Hisoka isn't his type. He hasn't drawn up a diagram to figure out what his type is but he is sure it isn't Hisoka.

"Thank god. I thought I was going to have to finally kill you." Hisoka exhales raggedly.

"It would be the highest honor if I had feelings for you." Illumi looks at him.

"Sure but if I had turned you down gently, you'd stalk me across the planet..." Hisoka grimaces.

"You think I'm that petty?"

"No. Not at all. You're just like me. I would stalk someone straight through the gates of hell." Hisoka lays his head in the crook of an arm.

"Let's hope we never subject anyone to that kind of torture." Illumi speaks with resolve. He loves Killua, so he has an inkling. He couldn't imagine tripling that kind of intensity. Loving someone who isn't your blood seems supernatural.

Normal folk would call it criminal insanity—it's just how he was raised.

"That's hilarious coming from you." Hisoka snorts.

"Is it really?" Illumi is a very literal person.

And Hisoka just stops talking. Illumi does the same.

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End file.
